Elvis is dead, but Billy Graham is not

Okay, in my message this week at the 11:15 service I made mention of the "late" Billy Graham. Strangely, at the previous two worship services (Saturday night and Sunday morning) I never said anything like that. Why I suddenly couldn't remember if Billy Graham was actually still with us, I really don't know! I think I just panicked... Sorry. I am grateful for those who gently pointed out my error. For the rest, you'll be glad to know I have carefully researched the matter and Billy Graham is very much still alive.

For those who were interested in the John Piper quote. It comes from his book Hunger for God (Crossway, 1997) pp. 14-15. I have not read the book, but apparently you can download it here. I think I might just have to check it out!

A book I have recently finished which is worth your time is Darrell Guder's Missional Church. The book is ten years old and was among those I've thought I should read "someday." I'm sorry I waited. "Missional" is all the buzz these days. Missional Church is the work that got everyone thinking.

Turkey Day Football Frenzy

Eleven total gathered at 8:00 a.m. Thanksgiving Day for what I am sure will grow to become a cherished CLPC holiday tradition - the first annual Turkey Day Football Frenzy. (Actually, I just made that name up. Hopefully someone else will have a better one.) Thanks Josh S. for organizing the event - even though everyone who showed up was greatly surprised to learn that you were out of town!! We had a great time. I don't know about any of the other 40+ guys this morning, but I ache in places I didn't know I had...

Intimacy Gone Wild

Recently our church hosted a mini-weekend on relationships called Intimacy Gone Wild. Our speakers were Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn, authors of "For Women Only" and "For Men Only," among others.

I don't know about you, but there was stuff Shaunti and Jeff said during the mini-weekend that pegged me perfectly. Like the bit about how Shaunti would put books about relationships on Jeff's nightstand only to see them pile up unread and gather dust. Guilty as charged.

However, I appreciated Jeff and Shaunti debunking the myth that women are good at relationships and men are not. The truth is both women and men hunger to connect and we both find ourselves lacking. This is part of the wildness of true intimacy though, right? Intimacy that is worth anything is fraught with risk, danger, and adventure. Unfortunately, too many relationships settle for "good enough."

"Good enough" was never God's design for human intimacy. God made us for the kind of wild intimacy found within God's tri-unity of relationship (Father, Son, and Holy Spirit). Take a look at the storyline of the Bible and you'll see the interplay between the three persons of the Trinity is filled with creative depth, risk, adventure and love.

I don't want an "okay" marriage, or "pretty good" friends. I want a marriage and friendships that are wild with God's intimacy and goodness.

B-ball

It sure was fun playing basketball tonight. But dang, my body aches!

A Video

Thanks youth and adults from one of the CLPC work crews for letting me use your mugs in my video! These guys worked really hard and blessed a number of people with their efforts.

Today I'm thinking about how hurricanes come in all shapes and sizes... Thankfully, our house all but completely escaped permanent damage from Ike. We had the usual tree limbs and brush in our yard. And we were without electricity for about a week. But in the end, it was not that big of a deal.

A few weeks before, another hurricane of sorts blew through my life. Preaching Sunday morning I found myself unable to concentrate on the words in front of me. After fumbling for a short time I invited the choir to go on without me and sing a few hymns. Just then, a thoughtful and gracious church member sprung out of her pew and whisked me off to the hospital ER. It could have been a stroke, a TIA, or some sort of neurological disorder. I spent two nights in the hospital and endured a battery of tests only to discover that what I've been experiencing is the somewhat rare condition of pain free migraines. I get all the common symptoms, but never get the throbbing head-ache. Weird huh? Hurricane blew through... I experienced a few loose branches, but in the end the house was secure.

I've been reading Jesus' "Talk on the Mount" (Matthew 5-7) every day. On most days, when I can find a quiet, out of the way corner in the house, I've been reading Jesus' Talk out loud. It's amazing what I pick up when I allow myself to hear Jesus' words rather than just reading them in my head. I've been struck with two things. First, there's a persistent repetitive promise that the Heavenly Father will give us what we need. He knows what we need and gives it to us freely and continually. He doesn't give us stones when we ask for bread. We ask the Heavenly Father and we receive. We knock, the Heavenly Father answers. The other part of Jesus' talk that keeps after me is this stuff about doing and practicing Jesus' words. He starts his talk with it and ends it there. 'Anyone who keeps these commands and teaches others to do the same will be called great in the kingdom...' And then in Jesus' conclusion he talks about the wise person who 'hears these words... and puts them into practice...' Jesus says this person will be like a person in a hurricane (my word) whose house doesn't blow over.

My physical house didn't receive any real damage from Hurricane Ike. My physical body seems to be pretty well in tact following my hurranical (is that a word?) Sunday episode that landed me in the hospital. But I've gotta confess. Hurricanes mess with my life! They blow again the house of my heart and their winds beat against the walls of my soul. But if Jesus is right, there's a way of making my life in his Way that will stand up to hurricanes. A Way that will not only bless me, but will bless my family, my neighbors and the world I live in.

So, I'm giving it a 'go.' I'm strapping on my sandals and am trying to follow as close as I can in the dust of Jesus' path.

Disclaimer

On Sunday I talked about five "do's and don'ts of relational conflict" using Joshua 22 as a case study. My premise was that if we apply these practices to conflicts in our families, workplaces and church, God will show up. We and those we interact with will be blessed.

But here's a disclaimer. It doesn't always work.

The Israelite tribes on the west side of the Jordan were able to successfully resolve their conflict with the Reubenites, Gadites, and the half-tribe of Manasseh (I love that, by the way… the "half-tribe."). I identified five principles of conflict resolution from the passage:

• DON'T draw your sword. (vv. 9-12). In other words, be patient in conflict. Don't go to battle right away like the Israelites were ready to do against their eastern brothers. Assume a posture of 'relaxed concern' that honors the seriousness of the matter while not becoming embroiled in it.
  
• DO talk directly to the person(s) involved. (vv. 13-14). Jesus prescribes this approach in Matthew 18:15-16. It's never helpful take your problems to other people while avoiding the one with whom you are in conflict. Triangulation is poisonous to healthy relationships.
  
• DON'T accuse (vv. 15-18). Assume a posture of inquiry rather than accusation. Rather than saying "how could you do such a thing!?" Say "help me better understand what you meant when you said or did such and such…"
  
• DO offer possible solutions (vv. 19-20). Relationships get tense and out of whack when people feel trapped, threatened and out of options.
  
• DON'T respond defensively (vv. 21-22). The Gadites, Ruebenites and half-tribe of Manasseh don't immediately defend their actions. Beautifully, they first place themselves in a posture of submission to God and humility toward their sister and brother Israelites. They are genuinely open to learning more about how they may have offended God or betrayed others.
  

The disclaimer is that these principles only work in relatively healthy relationships where there is a mutual commitment to one another's deepest good. It does not work when one side is committed more deeply to dominance. The above principles do not work, for instance, for a spouse trapped in an abusive relationship. In this sort of poisonous climate, asking your spouse yet again to "help you understand…" or offering possible solutions, will only be an invitation to hear that you always get it wrong and will never understand. If you are in a verbally or physically abusive relationship it is entirely appropriate (and wise) to seek the counsel of a godly third party without consulting your abuser.

Bay Area Turning Point (http://www.bayareaturningpoint.org/) is a wonderful resource in our community if you find yourself in such a situation.